MY SIN* ALL RIGHTS RESERVED STORY see Twitter inserts at some portions the longest Twitter account 9 plus years. I know no other Claudia Humphrey, married to that man.
untitled
SONGS FOR SOULS IS THE TITLE OF THE BOOK BY CLAUDIA ANN HUMPHREY
THIS IS PRIMARILY A BOOK OF SONGS WITH MISSIONARY STORIES[FOR ON ORDER]
THE OTHER ARTICLES ON BLOGS ALSO ARE BY CLAUDIA HUMPHREY
AND THE ARTICLE "MY SIN" IS BY CLAUDIA HUMPHREY AS WELL.
CLAUDIA HAS A LARGE PHOTO ALBUM CONTAINED IN SOCIAL MEDIA.
FOR USE ON TWITTER.COM, YOUTUBE, AND BLOGS=BLOGGER.
*all rights reserved STORY
by Claudia Humphrey composer-author since 1976 7/15/2010 1
My Sin!*
Just where do you think you are going!
I want to go to heaven, but my sin prevents me from being with those there!
I do not want to remain here but what can I do, will God receive me?
I am a sinner!
"…Rights and Limitations…" hereforth known or learned
Web browser has a red x do you want to save letters or personal info?
Are you all the affection to I study the bible all my life?
Are you the celebate?
Are you the love?
Do you see we are not in bed
Together? SAVING OURSELVES FOR GOD ATLAST!?
TURN
TO LETTERS NEXT PAGE
CorrespondenceCorrespondence *all rights reserved by Claudia Humphrey
composer-author since 1976 7/15/2010 2
SENSATIONAL?
PROFESSIONAL?
NO!
ITS NOW YOU SEE THE OUTAGES ARE ME AND THE PERFECTION IS GOD.
THIS IS NOT A BOOK FOR DUMMIES, BUT IF YOU ARE ONE
ITS O.K. TO CONTINUE.
GOD ALWAYS WINS, IT‟S THE ENTRY THAT GETS ME AND
I REALIZE I HAVE OMITTED SOME IMPORTANT DETAILS LIKE:
MENTION PROPHETS.
WELL WHEN YOU ARE NOT BEING OUTSIZED- COACHED, AND GOD IS YOUR LEADER,
THIS IS WHEN YOU GET TO LEARN JUST HOW MUCH YOU ESSENTIALLY LISTEN, TO
WHAT HE HAS TO SAY.
HE SAYS DON‟T OMIT STUFF.
WELL I WAS WELL INTO THE BOOK * THE SERIES(MISSIONARY) WHEN I REALIZED
HE WANTED ME TO SAY SOMETHING ABOUT SINS AND BACKSLIDING.
I WRITE SONG# 1 LORD…YOU TALK TO ME…" OR COMEBACK TO THIS BACKSLIDEN
HEART, THE DETAILS WERE LIKE THIS.
Claudia was divorced, with a small child(now remember this is the hard part,
a.) confess your faults
b.) don‟t omit stuff
c.) don‟t let fornication even be mentioned…‟.
Well, the goodness of GOD, took me through some loops.
(Just how does an Israelite get through life without sinning?)
*
My roots not a Jew
I had not even gotten to the, I am a gentile, part.
(Those who were not born of* JEWish origin)
You see if you are the seeds of Abraham, but not an Israelite, you are
a gentile. You might be a Christian.
Now Christians don‟t sometimes admit this
Sensational, if I am a gentile but not a Christian?
Professional, if I am a Christian gentile?
NO! IT SOUNDS LIKE JOKING!
The ideas is to get serious but with absolute joy.
Laugh while you are crying, when you see what God is doing for you.
Laugh out loud.
Holler…"HALLELUJAH!" *all rights reserved by Claudia Humphrey
composer-author since 1976 7/15/2010 3
I THINK I‟VE GOT IT!
I THINK I „LL WRITE A BOOK. (this being the third)
THEN GET real quiet and listen, that is the hard part.
While I am writing this, I am not thinking text, I need a text
reference I am thinking how things happen, then GOD
Says, "don‟t forget about Gen., Ex., Lev., Num.,
{at some point people say, does GOD talk to you…?)
How many times have people told you that you need a
relationship with God, and then say you are "crazy" when GOD talks to you?
Claudia was divorced and she went to find work in Hollywood,
This was after going to Loma Linda University. (You take the San
Bernadino Frwy to Riverside)
I was kept under the law through Seventh-day Adventism
I am Christ‟s and an heir from Abrahams‟s seed to the *promise.
In the fullness of my life, after the divorce, GOD raised his power to
me another level of GRACE to walk upon.
"Victoria" Mother had written a book and she was busy trying to get it
published.
In those times, that is what you do. No internet, no "my space"
No "utube", no copy machines just mimeograph or carbon copies. No usb
disk. To help you carry around your work,
Which then was handwritten.
The people she sought did not publish her book, the name was "The
three sons of Noah."
Mother was a licensed vocational nurse, and single by divorce. I lived
with her for a time in hollywood. We both worked at Kaiser Permanente
in Hollywood.
Hillary, my eldest daughter , was 6 months at that time and I lent her
out to hospital employees, to babysit her while I would work one or
two shifts, one of the sitter‟s left Hillary on the radiator while I
was at work and when I looked at her feet, they had *grill marks from
the furnace, I did not know what to do or who exactly this was and
poor Hillary could not talk yet.
Defame this now as attractive! Now it is getting real fearful and I
then searched my life and my apartment for answers and moved elsewhere
in the building. *all rights reserved by Claudia Humphrey
composer-author since 1976 7/15/2010 4
And denounce those days right now as a way to escape from your
marriage or commitment,
because, even if I was told somethings, I did not hear them or it. I
hear( the way of escape) it now in my future.
Sensational? NO!
The age of "mini skirts" "go, go" clubs.
General freedom were all around us.
But the Adventist message was the same, so we went to the Hollywood
Church, Elder Jones was the preacher.
We took the baby "Hillary" she was such a good baby.
While on the job at Kaiser I worked the swing shift 3-11 but mostly
the grave yard shift 11-7.
So while I slept before going to work she needed to be awake and she
would rattle her bassinette and wake me often so that by the time what
ever shift I had to go to work then, I was less rested.
I was consumed by work, then on a diet and generally believing, but
not knowing I was slipping, if I could see simply meant pray more and
be more vigilent about my life and its subtilties.
* the time this happened is lost to exactly what month but my
apartment had no floor heaters, so it had to be somewhere else.
The father of the baby would take her sometimes and I felt he needed
to be restrained at some point. So I had the lawyer make out the
papers of "restraining order." 1970.
This is not what you are suppose to automatically do, this is what I
did! There is no blueprint to make things happen it just was that way.
This single life with child was hard.
I had acquaintances of employees one which rapped me
With my child sleeping in her crib, great danger and subtitle are
these young men who know how to use a situation to
Maneuver there own agenda.
He came back but I subtily got rid of him and hid whenever I heard him
knocking, this went on for a couple of months then he came no more.
Another would take the baby and throw her up in the air and she would
fall to the bed bouncing, I thought this was rough so I stopped seeing
him, even though I had not slept with him.
I shared this with my mother, "Victoria", who had very much the "…fear
of the Lord…" and studied her bible diligently.
I learned that the people around us did not fear the Lord that much.
*all rights reserved by Claudia Humphrey composer-author since 1976
7/15/2010 5
Still In my self I could not deal with this inconsistent friend and
found another employee who was worse, though he led out at a high
level.
God forbid that you should desire to follow this or my children, for I
have repented of this course of life.
By the grace GOD saved me, but the details remain either to go before
me or to follow behind, because the outgrown shell of my existence was
not fully blossomed and there was danger of repeated action, though I
knew it not.
Will you cry now a little for me, will you feel my pain?
God forbid you to follow in this course of my mishaps. This "Queer" time.
For the victory that should be mine was not yet apparent.
The baby‟s father proposed to me again and I accepted.
I was certain that he was more mature that he and been before, his
reasons for unemployment were, however, baffling.
He said to me" Claudia , have you found anyone, that you love more
than me…?" , I was taken at that point, by him.
Though I did not call him "LORD" as did Sarah to Abraham, but I did
believe he was faithfully looking for Jesus as was I.
At some point I told him of my experiences, but one day I saw the man
who rapped me and I was totally shocked and rehearsed again to him
(the baby‟s dad) *, what happened to me.
You young women! Sensational, NO!
That is what men do, they find you, make you trust and weaken your
points then they come back and find you like nothing has happened.
*© all rights reserved
Do you know your own mind, are you determined and focus on a particular goal?
If you wish to be strong you must turn to the Lord. The subtilty is
apparent now!
The husband would have us engage in prison ministry, while he himself
studied to graduate from Loma Linda University.
I sewed all my clothes and costumes and sang.
With my mother I also sang and the Oratorio work flourished in San Diego.
We could commute from LLU to San Diego or to los angles every time we
fellowshipped (weekends) in evangelistic work.
The minister who married us was firm in the work and faithful to
deliver his relationship with GOD, to his parishioners. *all rights
reserved by Claudia Humphrey composer-author since 1976 7/15/2010 6
I did not wait to tell you "things," I trusted that everyone knew, for
they followed in all our trains, each bride each husband and each
church had an entourage of many people.
One year after second birth I went to school after the new baby
"Kah‟l‟ara" (kay laura) was born she, was a significantly bigger baby,
the father being six one and three quarters.
We lived near the University of Redlands the dad stayed with the kids
during my classes and we juggled our schedules and made things work,
which is what you do if you do not fail to communicate.
I did not know what arrogance meant, because I was from early youth
always asked to sing at church. It was expected of me to sing my best.
I did not know what it meant to be negative because I had both
positive and negative ideas.
I was positive about the advent message and negative about the world.
I learned the lessons of music theory at the university and at the
junior college I studied guitar.
If there were problems, I didn‟t‟ see them at this point.
When the dad and I got back together there was also traveling . where
the care of the first baby was in other‟s hands while we worked
government jobs.
I never megrated back to the public utilities job like before I got
married, but stayed a nurse aid or secretary or receptionist from that
point on. Connecting the dots of dollar signs and keeping one pay
check away from the street, we neither of us made a lot of money
beyond rent and personal needs with the children.
Felling secure from school I started writing music 2 years after the
second baby was born and yielded 32 songs for "Songs, For Souls,"
before it became a series.
We moved to Tucson for his ministry work.
There he had a radio broadcast and I did the promotional
announcements, for "Today‟s hope, Tomorrow‟s peace.
Now if you be a reader, you might find this interesting, the gripping
parts of fear, danger, violence, sex have to be
minimized, so you see a different slant of sensational, then the world
places it. A looking for GOD, and succeeding.
You might be persuaded that I have not received the revelation of the
scriptures being now that I have sinned.
Some vigilant people regard a very difined, cut off point.
Others call grace a maturation where you learn from your mistakes.
*all rights reserved by Claudia Humphrey composer-author since 1976
7/15/2010 7
Christ learned obedience through the things he suffered,(not through
things he sinned, being different from us, without sin.
So he was being formed even though he was not breaking the ten commandments.
Do you know the depths of GOD‟S mercy, toward me that while I was yet
a sinner GOD saved me?
And he winked at my ignorance.
Having been in the flock and taught the scriptures, yet struggling as
a child of divorce myself and finding occasion to sin due to the lack
of victory or lack of information on how to succeed or how to overcome
on moral fronts, is what young people deal with even when their
parents are not divorced.
Were I to say to you, perservere, so that you might be a Moses who was
a murderer, and what of of another leader a Paul " circumcised, above
all Peter, a betrayer yet "rock" of the church.
We compare sometimes just this way.
That any leader might have strengths and weaknesses, temptations,
sufferings, perils, overcomings, some of our faith in Christ, while
others in our weakness of application.
Now it is as though I hurry to write a book, because the time has fled
when I first heard "Jesus, will come soon" The things in the bible
have affected me well, for by the time my 2nd baby was three years
old, I had completed the entire first book of songs.
The ministry in Tucson, Arizona, was a fellowship who did not follow
the church manual, where is prescribed the use of ingathering funds.
This disillusioning fact resonated with the husband and Claudia (me)
and we fled these as though fleeing Sodom and Gomorrah!
I did not hear the LORD say, you are not good, I only heard warnings
and beware in context for when Jesus says "...what hath hindered you
that you obey not the truth…," I was not able always to verbalize what
hindered me!
In our search for a better life, the husband and I both failed to be good.
Providers and for a time struggled miserably after the ministry as
though we wandered into a wilderness, but of our own making. That
being lacking of purpose, and planning or direction.
I planned to set my book to recitals and presented them though this
may have been a strain it was a joy to lift me up to new hopes.
Singing and praising and presenting seem to be a focus under GOD I
could endure the people encouraged this ministry with coming away
"feeling healed" they would say. At this I knew if he or she did not
*all rights reserved by Claudia Humphrey composer-author since 1976
7/15/2010 8
recognize me a singer and writer he did not know me by now, times had
changed and so had our life. Therefore these could not know my husband
or children or work.
The husband was called to personnel board at gamc and then to become
associate director of mental health.
He had a degree in sociology. This life style others would emmulate,
but I am not sure just why. Because we were the first negro family
executives at gamc. We sought to mingle to be in the social and choir
setting.
We would not fail the music and the church, all my life that is where
I was, as I was told "just sing… Claudia…"
I wrote John Hancock, whose son was in my elementary class. The Father
being the President of General Conference.
There as delegate(s) I went as did my army veteran brother Shannon D.
Goodwin, to General Conference Session in Dallas , Tx 1980.
We sang and I sang my composed music, "Count it all joy."
I returned to be in the summer play, the first Adventist in a major
role with the Glendale Civic Music Theatre.
I did not see * warning signs, but sang resolutely the role of the
Reverend Mother Abbess, in "The Sound of Music."
The S.D.A.‟S would say "why…, isn‟t that catholic role?" Which are all
the teaching you must go into, so that you are not a part of that
concision, (a different doctrine.) I felt doctrine had nothing to do
with a civic theatre show. Other subtile differences were that I had a
very big voice and most congregations who used me as soloist, were
always the weak soprano section, looking for a voice that could
sustain the classical repertoire of most finer sacred works and
composers, at my prime this was very prevalent.
MOTIVES AND VALUES:
HAVE NOT BEEN HERE‟ WORLDLY‟?
HIRED FOR WHAT REASON
ARE YOU CONSULTED WITH
ARE YOU DISIGNATED AS
I could not see myself as 2 religions although I could see fellowship
among Christians a lot!
Baptists
Methodists
Reformers all hired me on salary as a lead singer, director, pianist
and organist.
These were confidence makers for through colleges the ads were
supplied where we could apply for the work as musicians. I got on
honor role at Glendale college and friends of music scholarship at
CSULA. *all rights reserved by Claudia Humphrey composer-author since
1976 7/15/2010 9
At home the children were in school, elementary schools in Glendale
and Glendale academy.
When tuition became too much for us, we put them in public school.
Though my husband income was good, the rent was not free.
We applied for credit help and emanated our account system.
Living what I would say happy Christian lives also doing private music
lessons since Tucson, also in Glendale
Piano
Flute
Guitar for beginners.
My bible study was now 5 chpt a day and my studies at college were good.
I heard about the metropolitan opera auditions in new York and since I
had the academics of music, at csula I pursued the auditions with the
Executive Director.
First I got Lucy Battersby, then Rise Stevens, set me up for a
performance auditions at Franz Lizst hall in Lincoln Center.
Friends and aquaintences sponsored my trip.
What also were other friends or teachings:[*warning us of doctrine or
concision as to "appear" other than what we are taught.
I want to be an angel
"I want to be like an angel"
Finding myself in the subway saying those words to realize
How far the Lord has brought me to a vital goal.
To be "decent," to find solutions to help people.
There are so many people out there without daily help.
We sing "out on the highways and byways of life, many are weary and
sad…" yet what we do when we see them is
Analyse their source, their need and who is going to give it to them.
Accountable for what I see and what I know, not from a list
Of dos and don‟t others have seen that already have past
Through a level of existence to extinction.
The levels to deal with are your own, plus to realize what it costs to
relegate some time and talent and authority to your situation, without
some type of overseer(s) who will not invest in your program but act
as if they want what you are doing.
Let‟s start over on a few pointers of sins of commission and omission
and shame on you for making this seem sensational or professional!
Well now I see the wrinkles pronounced the age defines.
The old wrinkle of sin has diminished in builded and softened not with
new clothes, trimming excercises, or material wealth, but by deep
repentance and sincere endeavors of love and mercy.
Singing through the corridors of time. I fell into indigence not due
to lack of dilligence in my younger years. The pay day, came *all
rights reserved by Claudia Humphrey composer-author since 1976
7/15/2010 10
ceribticiously , before "erratas" were know to me. Deeper meanings had
not surfaced as I walked, the many vacant miles in search of friend
and job, yet< not aware that people would try to interpret my search
with highlights, visual aids and signs (un asked for )and
Not submitted for my permission or agreement. I pursued,
all spirited believing, yet having no evidence of those
things which I sought in the freedom of Jesus my Lord.
Laying a path of questions by onlookers who would somehow think their
answers were what I sought instead of God, some of them too acting out
as though God had done this for me, were human waymarks, unscriptural
and not aided by prayer, or connected agreements, ( that which is
attained through fellowship and unity).
I know only little what harm would be done, after I left my husband
for a job in California, little did I know, he would have to rescue my
"baby" who was by then 10 years old.
These little girls, were my dolls, but I didn‟t plan evil, nor did I
know there was no compassion for me and the little one in the job
market.
I gave my overview a quick glance and decided I would do ***"whatever
it takes" to survive by then, they had come to get her, because I was
fired from my* domestic job.
I told my little one soundly, "… go and live with your dad and do
everything he tells you to do…". My morality at this point was still
in tact but weeks later I found myself slipping.
Because I had to leave California and find a home in Oregon. I left
with a male friend, and we stayed together for two months.
I went to visit neighbors and alas! This Christian did a double take
on her life.
Realize sitting as guest and rehearsing the events of my life as
though some shabby soap opera had taken over, I sat in the neighbor‟s
house. She listened but added nothing.
This is where we talked about sins of commission and omission for in
the vast future before my "series" of books were edited, no one asked
me what I had done. Even though I talk with Jesus.
No one took my life personal enough to say can I help you recover,
change or amend your life. As a consequence of being in a substance
abuse program I learned more of my sins of commission and ommisson to
make actions of reformation. I began to count the number of days I had
not sinned( not yet seeing or reading into it "…teach us to number our
days…") ,
I counted I had not sinned certain sins 40 days 80 days 1200 days 2300
days like cleaning the sanctuary. (it was my sanctuary, my heart and
that job was a life time of introspection gains and losses!)
The fellows with whom I willingly went astray never surfaced in the
amends process but the one who raped me, and that was without apology
he arrived. *all rights reserved by Claudia Humphrey composer-author
since 1976 7/15/2010 11
Lets call sin coming "unglued", no nerve, "just plain weak", no
spiritual backbone, resistence, studied but not practiced.
And well on the way to being a unwise virgin to the party of Christ‟s making.
From age 40 I started the problem. My husband had a government funded
job and when the cutbacks came, he was cut off. While I was in the
peek of success with school and performance.
I got a call to go to New York so I went( as I said before) to the
performance compliment of Rise stevens, who at that time was the
Executive Director of auditions for the new York metropolitan opera.
My resume was short of repertoire, but I did a "song set" and she
promised to have me meet some people in new York. I chose to go home,
I did not think I was joseph the prince in Egypt, ready to take on the
"dreams" of great monarchs.
I would not stay without my family. I was in my fourth college year.
In Philadelphia, later:
What did this mean?
It meant I lacked vision for what I was to face.
I followed my husband blindly across the U.S.A. a good trait to
follow, but bad trait to be blind! We are suppose to do this ( however
I was unprepared) Lost in a masquerade>>"
Because I did not insist on staying in school my senior year, what was
he thinking, he finished his fourth year?
When he was in the ministry
it was the same profile.
He said we should leave, so we did and it was many months before his
next appointment to work.
I wanted to be faithful and I was while I was with him.
But I did not know how to "stay " with him and the lack of support
from all the fellows only meant who cares? And a lot of it!
If then, I would measure my " trials" as the cross, could I realize It
was something to surmount? I don‟t remember stop praying. I went in
the social and spiritual shock.
This occurs when though prayer and bible study and
Cohesiveness is in the marriage, the subtilties of trouble
set in, when unchecked, at every level. Thinking to help him solve his
employment unconnectedness, I went to find work in California, by that
time my unemployment checks had run out.
While earlier enroute and moving I was still doing concert work and
had an opera matinee at a college base.
Once in Philadelphia, I made the soloist rank for Mayor‟s and
Governor‟s banquet(Samuel Evans leading), having already written
endowment foundations, who replied
"sorry we can‟t help"… but congratulations on your
New York audition…" *all rights reserved by Claudia Humphrey
composer-author since 1976 7/15/2010 12
I concluded "what is the use?" the talent the practice the schooling
and effort…this sinful, digression became typical when no one gave a
care.
My judgement as a Bishop is to condemn the actions and persuasions
that lead up to this type of thinking, this book is not telling you go
out and try any of this, it is meant to be a serious warning of the
pitfalls of complacency or lack of vigilance.
When we are under satan‟s vehement attacks we don‟t visualize the way
of escape but God will provide.
I write this as a great sinner
Redeemed and reconciled by Jesus Christ, who in my heart and life
cannot be an unknown and unspoken or unsung hero!
"…the heart is indeed disperately wicked, who can know it…"
Yes, yes, yes!
Now I look in retrospect and as I do I appear to be in the
Coming age, with as the Lord says " some sins go before us while
others come behind us"( reference:________)
I see the young people who so desperately need help and guidance and
our age says to them don‟t discipline.
Don‟t teach unless you have a certificate, don‟t instruct,
or lend a hand, I say shame, shame, shame!
The risks are to be taken if you understand the right
Meaning of moral turpitude.
The marytr‟s risks are taken, the homelessness is
the life of a refugee or a suffregete coming out of
the world and coming to Chirst‟s side, to be rescued.
They can teach many by the woes they have suffered
And the neglect thrust upon them.
Mental reservation was not maintained by apostle Paul.
He did not lie to protect the church.
I have nothing about the church to say of their sins,
I have something to say about my own sins. Check for missing data
sensational number collected for the overall My Sin (report)
*** the complaint was I was doing" my hair" on the job(while no one
was there) *all rights reserved by Claudia Humphrey composer-author
since 1976 7/15/2010 13
This side of recovery
I looked down between my legs and there was a diamond on the ground.
I looked around, no one was saying that is mine
I went to the jewelers to get an idea of what the baguettes were in
price range about 1200 to 1500 dollars is where I viewed.
Then later I thought like a person in recovery,
Better tell someone else…(I thought)
They all said they were theives or made some comment about the whys to cash it.
Earlier I ratitonalized this is perfect, no one has claimed it because
there is no obvious place of loss, and did God place an opportunity
for me to pay for my trip to Atlanta, Georgia. ( later reveals how
miraculously God encouraged people to help with her trip. But at the
time I needed the money, I had been asking but people "poor eye you"
into do not ask you are lucky to be alive. They don‟t get into, the
worthiness of the profession or your talents or deserving parts, with
me it is"… you are lucky".
WHAT PART OF TEMPTATION WAS THIS? NONE, IT WAS A PART OF CHANCE,
BUT NO ONE TO ANSWER TO BECAUSE OF THEIR OBVIOUS LOSS.
Over that weekend I looked across the crowded gym and there was my son in law.
It is my grandson‟s graduation, the lady said.
The lady is a recovered drunk who thought she was divorced.
The glowing report that this graduate brought reminded her of so many
things, for instance her own graduation and scholastic achievement.
The interwoven problems of divorce and children after.
The absent years and gaps in the relating and reunion.
The inability of others part to admit their role of abuse and its
affects on others, or the neglect overall of the remaining years to
fetch others up when we ourselves grow.
The lady had recovered but in the wreckage she arose a harder worker
but without the pension retirement and material goods to show for it.
She remembered wanting to be a wife and mother, but what she got was 2
divorces from the same man and dissappointed children and many sober
miles or a lonely open roads to walk ,where God resided to help, but
humans refused to resonate to this/the cause. *all rights reserved by
Claudia Humphrey composer-author since 1976 7/15/2010 14
MY SIN
PART TWO
People observe you on the street, coming and going. They all act so
amazed, the travail, the suffering, the lonely look of this lady whose
station was corporate level, that was me.
When I did things I was not supposed to, a lot of times I had already
done them and then realized that I was ignorant, or trapped, or
excused in some way or fashion that overlooked the situation as it
presently happened to me.
The occurrences of actual sin begin at a very early age, when your
parents clearly explain to you do this and don‟t do that.
When the occasion arises, and you do commit sin you will find that it
did not seem or sound just like your parents said, and it didn‟t feel
as bad as the whipping you may have gotten, in our present age even
communities try to amend God‟s take on"… training up a child…".
You somehow excused yourself to repeat any or/the episode either
decidedly becoming a habit and a shame in your mind.
Repeated behavior is usually unchecked but mostly uncaught, and
therefore escapable by human means to answer for its inception or root
cause.
Avoiding writing about this would be a sin of omission since when I
first started the ministry I started an exercise of apologetics which
in times became long lapses of not getting back to the point of it.
Or later new information or technology and computerized knowledge
invaded the other material information ready to be applied.
Sin escapes opportunity to repent again and again through convenience
and excuses.
If we are blessed enough to continue living we might live to see it
repented but usually it becomes habitual and people get used to us
with these strange flaws in our nature. *all rights reserved by
Claudia Humphrey composer-author since 1976 7/15/2010 15
While I know very few human beings invited me to do something wrong to
my face, there were occasions usually outside stimuli
Such as t.v. and ads , etc that represented an opportunity simply
because it was an accepted domain to receive information.
And thus
we don’t grow.
Of course you will need rules as you go along.
For you see sin is not in heaven, it is on earth
And those who commit it are usually experts in it, what ever the habitual sin.
The best thing to do is keep confessing, God I know I do this or that,
I want to stop it and I need a way of escape. He will give you
suggestions as you go along on how to accomplish that if you continue
in that pattern.
Even when you have been acutely habitual in certain areas, you need to
have God remind you so that you can come out of her, that sin, which
so easily besets, you!
Rights and Limitations.
You don‟t mean to amend what you have done?
You simply cannot apply rules where there are none!
The stipulation of a rule must be applied before an amend can be taken.
Therefore if you are to be honest, you must recognize the orientation
to rules and regulations.
If it is the common law of the people and community, you cannot say
that the mere placement of them in the community made you aware of
them.
Therefore you justly shall apply what you hear and not what you know.
For example, the sin of ignorance is not excused by law in most places.
If you do not know what the rule is it will be exacted upon you just
like those who do know that rule or law or regulation.
"The rain falls on the bad and the good…" whether you are watering
your crops or have even planted some. *all rights reserved by Claudia
Humphrey composer-author since 1976 7/15/2010 16
When going from place to place each rule will vary according to the
needs of the common people.
If you break those rules it will be excercised upon you even if only
to make an example of what should not be done.
A person who does not make himself aware of the rules around him can
stumble into many a pitfall because he cannot abide by simple rules,
some of them are simple safety and health rules.
Insanity prevails and those who will be a fool will not adhere to
anything until the impending law is forced upon them,
the very demons traveling upon the earth seeking a body they can possess.*
This pamphlet is meant for you as a syllabus of understanding
what rule there is,
what rule there is broken,
there is either a transgression or an amend,
if the transgression does not get amended it is not pardoned,
there must be someone to pay for the transgression if no one will pay
for them, like a signature of one condoning or not.
But if you do not know a rule you cannot amend what has been done
therefore it becomes ignorance to the common law, and no one can
sign or recognize your difficulty when it comes, or pay in your behalf.
The greater law is one that owes God.
Like say for instance you trifle a way to God all the time and
Say: "..if you do this for me I will do this for you…"
Then that is a law that you owe God and you must reverence to pay it.
If you trifle with mankind and owe them the same rule applies but the
consequences are seen differently from person to person.
Those who do not know the written rules like scripture or bible
Have a code of faith that is not hinged upon either good sense
Or moral value.
They do not necessarily say to themselves if I do such and such a
thing, I will hurt God or my fellow man.
But if they are taught, systematically and from the very beginning or
if they learn later on in life:
Don‟t *all rights reserved by Claudia Humphrey composer-author since
1976 7/15/2010 17
Kill Don‟t
Steal Don‟t
Commit un lawful sexual acts
Be kind to your parents
Then is when you see how honest comes into play, for to apply these
rules is also a witness of who told you them and how they
Themselves applied the rules they give you.
If they are honest they will not break the rules either or they
Will be a hypocrite.
A hypocrite breaks a belief in rules.
A rebel goes against rules for what ever reason they defy them.
Sorrow
Anger
Distrust
Resentment
Fear
greed
Deadly sins like greed are talked about by many cultures beyond the
cycle of religious instruction or church, because they are things that
affect community and structure of peoples abiding together in a place.
The reason why these look the same is because they are paraphrased.
One
God first
Two
No portrayal of God, for he is a spirit.
Three
Protect the name of God as a reverent protector and make of all
Four
Bless your parents and treat them well
Five
Take time out to rest for yourself and respect what God does.
Six *all rights reserved by Claudia Humphrey composer-author since
1976 7/15/2010 18
Don‟t take what is not yours
Seven
Don‟t take someone‟s life
Eight
Don‟t take his or her body in uncommitted lawful bond
Nine
Don‟t covet other people things
Ten
Don‟t talk falsely about others
If you find a bible the rules God has said are these
But these words are placed here for sample of the most important
rules, God has said.
Now when someone comes to you and says did you make amends
And are telling you what you ought to do, but ……you know that there is
a rule, or a law and a practice of those rules.
There are many rules that govern mankind but what frustration is there
when no one knows before hand what they are, then they are left to do
anything they please, and when that is done, someone
will be challenged again and again.
I found my self in a whirlwind of what was your name again and
realized that if I didn‟t talk to you for a month or two I probably
wouldn‟t remember your name whom ever.
The close contact of persons resonates at the repeated use and
association of where and when they are present.
This is also the way it is with God, if you don‟t use him often
and repeatedly you begin to forget who and what He is in your life and
to identify his spirit might take some real concentration on your
part.
That is what my sin does, it lulls me into forgetfulness and I become
so unaware of the harm that may be impending.
Controlling my life through a knowledge of my sin will not be
sufficient to keep me but for a while through stark raving fear.
Because of its consequences. It take much more to keep me out of
trouble, but constant prayer is a good one of controlling them, for
when I think I have overcome some thing, I spring a leak in another
*all rights reserved by Claudia Humphrey composer-author since 1976
7/15/2010 19
area, that without prayer and reading the bible I would probably be
blinded by the affects of my own stupidity and illusions or ignorance.
I want to make amends for wrongs done, and to the right people,
But when I commit a particular wrong, that person seems to be
unavailable or the risks of hurting my self in the process while
In route takes on a momentum of fear and guard, how can I approach
people I have done wrong to or with.
Give them a call on the phone.
Write an honest letter of amends.
Return things that don‟t belong to me, even things where I work or go
to school are a challenge to others as I hear or read about what they
do.
Turning from those wrongs to never repeat them too.
But I must admit sin is something like this, *all rights reserved by
Claudia Humphrey composer-author since 1976 7/15/2010 20
DOCUMENT OF RULES?/ FROM GOD (REAL RULER) It doesn’t matter what sin
it is, or transgression, they all seem to function like this:
That looks attractive
That looks like it feels good
That looks like it tastes good I wonder what that feels like
Mmmmmmm! That smells good
I think I will try that ..,Now on some occasions it will be
Why don’t you try that,
That looks good, It probably smells good or taste good
Try it just once. Well like before, try it again it will be better! Or
excuses, look at the way I am treated, I deserve better,
Look at the results of my behaviour, I am not rewarded so I think I
will rationalize. ( say It like this for example: " Raw shun ill
eyes")
Or perhaps it is a sneaky suggestion,
"You can’t tell me what to do…"
Such a surprise, you didn’t even know you had it in you to do that
But there it is and there you go head long into it.
Now if you be an honest person looking for God you will begin to say,
Oh God, I need to get out of this invitation to do this wrong .
I do not want to go against you God. Please instruct me, help me,
And tell me exactly what to do regarding this.
Or say satan wants me to do this or that please help me God!
OR SAY GOD I AM IN THAT OLD SIN AGAIN OR I AM ABOUT TO DO THE SAME THING!
When I have turned down a road of temptation the road back to,
Spiritual strength seems so long, so many miles to travel before I am
on course again.
First place God in your life,
Like, i.e.:
Will this hurt God, I mean really hurt his feelings?
Will this hurt me, my friends and my loved ones?
*all rights reserved by Claudia Humphrey composer-author since 1976
7/15/2010 21
There are times when I did not know I was headed for a course of
destruction, and I was reminded that a family that prays together
stays together, well we did, But that was not where I was tempted, You
see I was tempted in the course of doing good and right.
I was on a righteous path to save or salvage something that in a
Christian home might be destroyed, and I did not want to be an
infidel.
In the belief that I would do anything to survive, I found that deadly
course of sins that "easily beset me" and did not utilize freely the
course of asking God for a way to escape, I was deceived and did not
know I needed a way of escape.
Awareness helps, prayer helps but vigilance and a knowledge of
personal weaknesses all are good tools to stay on course.
You must be willing to stop sinning, and accept God’s plan for your
life to escape temptation.
What exactly is temptation to me?
When on page one you can begin to see how these following precepts
Could have taken hold earlier in my life.
It is coming away from a course of good rules to a selfish point of
view that leads to….
a. disappointing God
b. destroying and disappointing ones self
c. hurting others and disappointing them
d. influencing in a bad way
e. become someone to avoid
f. not being able to pay back the harm done.
g. Creating habits that are hard to break
h. Health and safety are at risk in many temptations
i. Loss of good wholesome fellowship insues
j. Eventual ruin if nothing is done regarding them
k. Not wanting forgiveness or repentance is at risk
l. Wages of death in many cases but without amending
m. Eventual loss of consciousness of wrongs, and spiritual death.
n. Harmony with the wrong type of friends and influences
o. Denial that the scripture is true and a good guide for all.
p. Premeditation of an evil deed and carrying it out repeatedly,
This is of course a paraphrase of a lot of study from bible texts
I would suggest people get into the bible and would go so far as to
find a "text index" for my sin given time for it. *all rights reserved
by Claudia Humphrey composer-author since 1976 7/15/2010 22 This is
prepared by Claudia Humphrey for the sake of fundsfor ministry in her
work,
Not intended as public domain
The scripture is paraphrased if you can find it!
From the kjv
All other notes, letters and ideas herein called MY SIN
ARE BY CLAUDIA HUMPHREY: (c) Claudia Humphrey all rights reserved
